Master Messenger

Every two weeks students in Mrs. Burke’s empire gets a job. Things like “Imperial Zookeeper” (feeding the class hamster, tortoise and hermit crab), “Majestic Gardener” (watering the plants), and “Royal Paper Monitor” (in charge of collecting and handing out papers).

But the best job in Mrs. Burke’s Empire is “Master Messenger”.Charlie running as class messenger

When you’re Master Messenger, you get to deliver things anywhere in the school. Mrs. Burke might send you to ask Mr. Turchin the custodian for help, or ask you to bring back something from the library or the office or even the teachers’ lounge. It means you get out of class and you’re in the hallway all by yourself while everyone else in the whole school is stuck in their classrooms suffering.

I haven’t been the Master Messenger. Yet.


Selling Chocolate Bars

sellingneighbors1“And finally, in a couple of weeks, we’ll be handing out boxes of chocolate bars to sell for the league. We really need everyone to pitch in so the league can buy new equipment and pay the refs. Mrs. Patel will be in charge of keeping track of the sales. So start thinking about who might buy some candy from you. See you all at practice next Thursday!”

Selling stuff! Oh no! Grown-ups are always having kids sell things. In second grade I had to sell greeting cards and wrapping paper for a school fundraiser, and it had been a complete disaster. Nobody on my street wanted to buy anything, and my mom only bought one roll of wrapping paper with candy canes on it because she felt sorry for me. I sold the least in my class, and of course Samantha Grunsky, who is ALWAYS in my class and ALWAYS ANNOYING, sold the most in the whole school and won a bicycle.

Eating candy bars is a wonderful idea. Selling them is not.